What was Written about Histon's Players

Although there is no connection, as far as is aware, to Hereford United, the recent story from the Conference about Histon and their website information on their players has raised a few smiles.

Apparantly when Cambridge played Histon recently some of the pen-pics in the match programme weren't very kind to some of the Histon players.

Here's a selection:

Chris Dillon: joined from Hitchin Town in March and scored on his debut in August, though it wasn't enough to prevent Histon losing 2-1 to Stevenage. Has maintained an impressive record of one goal every three games, mainly because he's only played two more and didn't score in either.

Antonio Murray: cost a mint (geddit?) when joining from Hibernian last season (out of interest just how do you get to join Histon from Hibernian?) According to the club, former Ipswich trainee Antonio has demonstrated he has great potential to become one of the League's outstanding goalscorers. That'll be with his 3 goals in 20 games then!

Mark Webster: has been at the club for five years and played a leading role in last year's reserve side as captain. Intriguingly, according to Histon's website Mark's height is still "unknown". How do you manage to keep something like that unknown for 5 seasons? Platform soles of varying measurements? An extendable neck? Or does John Beck stretch him on a rack after each training session? It's pretty impressive whichever.

Gareth Gwillim: joined Histon in the summer after captaining Bishops Stortford last term. According the their website, his delivery is as good as anyone's and indeed he recently beat Parcelforce and DHL in the annual Christmas showdown before losing to Domino's Pizza in the final.

Mathew Mitchel-King: has been on the books of Cambridge United, Cambridge City and Histon. Make your mind up Matt, there's a good chap. Six bookings and one sending-off this season means he's got more cards that Hallmarks.

Roscoe Hipperson: is actually known as 'The German' for reasons that aren't entirely clear. Well not clear in the slightest in fact, but he does hold an unique position in the English game, being the only player to be called Hipperson. Or Roscoe for that matter, apart from some bloke at Accrington.

Robbie Nightingale: is in his fifth season at the Glassworld and during this time has always been an influential player within the team. Robbie is another to suffer from Unknown Height Syndrome, so if you want to pick him out during the game, work out the height of his team mates and whoever's left, well that's Robbie.

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